of brokenness

Here I am, Oh God
Once again I come
To Your grace I stand
Before You I bow down

I am weak and frail,
foolishness took me;
sins crawled to my being;
succumbed to doubt and fear.

Day after day I ask for hope
but it seems so faint;
so blurred and far away,
like a fog before a dawn.

I couldn’t give myself one
because inside me there’s nothing
left to be proud of,
no good comes thereof.

I was like those who were in the shadows
with no keen sight of what’s beyond;
astrayed and stumbled
against stones of what’s behind.

It seems good to give in,
to give up and let go
of this life and just fall,
and go back to the wicked ways of old.

It seems easy to do it,
far more convenient than what is right–
to be tempted to return
to the dark ways of self.

But it is not this day;
for to fall away is more foolishness
amidst a time of trying–
this day is given for many chances–

To obtain life and to keep it,
to have it abundantly,
to hold, then to offer;
giving it away to Whom it is due.

Once again I come to You
as plain as I am;
For brokenness is all I am in now
and my heart is torn into pieces.

By my own strength I can’t do this alone;
by my own might I cannot achieve victory.
Let Your strength be as mine,
Let Your valor be upon me.

Lord, lift me up above the sea
and place me in Your high mountain,
that as winds chill and strike me,
like an eagle I will be, soaring against it.

Let me come to You as I truly am,
that I may behold who You really are
in my life, and the things You are doing
to keep these members of my soul back to the living.

Let me come to You as I truly am,
let me come in brokenness;
because it’s the only thing I could offer;
the only sacrifice I could not withhold.

Give peace to my troubled mind,
and hope to my doubting heart;
strength to my weary flesh,
and renewal to my burnt-out soul.

There’s nothing more to be said or done
than to go back and fall at the cross
for there was death to bring to life;
to bring death in me and alive in Christ.

Oh Lord, give me joy once again
for the future beyond me seems unclear.
But I know You’re the One who holds it true;
You who called me is the One to be trusted.
Let me not put confidence to myself or to men,
but to You alone, Oh God, the LORD who saves.
AMEN.

//poem created: 06-30-12//


+++

We, as believers, aren’t invulnerable as we seem to be (or others seem to be). True that it’s easier to fall away, but it’s foolishness. I know I’m not the only one who can experience it. To deny one’s weakness is to be proud of one’s self-confidence, and that is not what we ought to do.

And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

~2 Corinthians 12:9-10, NKJV~

I praise God for He always keeps me and upholds me through and through. I thank Him for I know He’s the only one certain in my life.

The sacrifice pleasing to God is a broken spirit.
O God, you do not despise a broken and sorrowful heart.

~Psalm 51:17, GW~

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